Tuesday, October 31, 2006

A Glutton for Gluten

For lunch today, we went to Macy's and had a monstersize chocolate cupcake (which comes with a mountain of chocolate frosting), cheese ravioli, mac & cheese, and garlic mashed potatoes (dont stand too close to me). What brought on this gluttony in spite of my low tolerance for gluten? Well, we are depressed. Yes, yes, it's for real. I once said "we" recently to a friend when she asked "how's the novel", i said "we have moved onto other projects." She stopped mid conversation to say "who is we?" Well, silly, it's me, myself and i. So, y'all, all three of us are in the dumps.

So, what induced this royal slip into the abyss? Well, dont you know? I cant have kids. Ha ha. Funny, aint it. So funny. And then, this upcoming weekend, the wonderful, thoughtful Fertile Soul decided to host her sister's baby* shower ... in her very own house ... and bake the cake too. I know, i'm just ridiculous. But, in all fairness to the dear sis, i am the only sister ... well, the only adult sister. And, what was i to do? Just not let her have one? And she doesnt live near me anymore but all her friends do. So, either i do it, or there's nothing, right? I just couldnt not do it. I just couldnt. And, i was feeling up to it when i said i would. Seriously. I thought i would be okay.

But, now, suddenly, i get a bill in the mail from my last ivf of THREE MONTHS AGO and i cant stop balling. Trick or Treat! Here's a bill for $1500 because your insurance company DENIED coverage.

I guess, i've been feeling financially stressed. The house gets messy easily (ie the boudoir) because we need some new furniture. Our bedroom dressers were left over from dh's childhood. Yeah, do you know how old that is? Let's just say that this furniture is from the 60s. I need new furniture because i need enough space to fit everything. ok? So i cant throw anything out and i'd rather buy more furniture than throw stuff out, so?! You wanna make something of it??--this is the inner dialogue we struggle with. It's not easy being me. Just buy some new furniture already and be happy! No, we must have this internal debate that lasts a decade and another decade to decide the perfect "set" to buy ... speaking of which, i saw this awesome leather/cherrywood sleigh bed ....mmmmmmmm, nice. Could i get a king size bed, while i'm at it? Yeah, i'm probably the last person on earth who still sleeps on a queen. What was i thinking? I'll tell you. When i got married i was very much a hippy dippy girl and decided the floor would be fine. Yes, the Fertile Soul is such a simple girl at heart. So, she slept on the floor for the first 4 years, when she finally decided a bed was in order. So a queen bed was a HUGE improvement over the floor.

In defense of the q-bed, i think i will miss it if i ever graduate to a king. Sometimes i think i want a king just so i can rollover without asking dh to move over in the process. But then, i'll miss all the cuddling. Does anyone cuddle anymore on a king? I'd be too lazy to scoot over. Once my head hits the pillow, that's it, i'm not moving.

In other news, what's up with Ryan and Reese! I havent been this sad since Jessica and Nick. Actually, i'm mad. Work it out people! Work it out. Did you hear that married people are in the minority? I'm thrilled to be a part of that minority. People should marry, i say.

Ok, Dancing With the Stars is on, which I AM NOT WATCHING, but what the heck are these women wearing??? And then they have these dance moves where the women time their kicks at exactly the same moment that the camera flashes them, so you basically have a re-enactment of Sharon Stone in Basic Instincts except with underwear (only i wouldnt know since i've never actually seen that movie, thank God). Women, why must you debase yourselves and get sucked into doing soft porn on prime time? Like, i'm definitely not watching this stuff with my dh, cuz the only Basic Instincts he needs to see are mine. ... But then , i guess, that explains why marriage is on the decline. What's so special about it, when all the salacious parts are on prime time free for all?

Anyway, i'm off to go see a movie because it's been a while and i'm in a craptastic mood and i cant stand to stay home and watch garbage.

Also, how come only 3 people came to my house for trick or treating when there's about 5 kids in every house on our block? I think i live on the most fertile block on the planet....hence, my escape to the dark room of a theater and into the life of someone else.

*Update: I initially typed bridal shower, but that was so last year. It's now time for the baby shower. I detect a freudian slip in there somewhere, but i cant figure it out.


At 8:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You weren't cornered into hosting the baby shower, and the logistics were not so compelling too. You did it because you're a good person, and despite your feelings and hurt, your goodness is strong enough to show you the good thing to do.

As for the dancing show, it is soft porn. No other way to look at it (forgive the pun). We make fun of burkas and veils, but have no qualms about women humiliating themselves in a "contest" as real as WWF. Watch out for falling contradictions.

At 5:05 AM, Blogger Wishing 4 One said...

Wow I wish I were at that macy's lunch with you ...one to talk to you all three of you and two to induldge in such glutenous treats with u guys, yum, yummy.

Screw the insurance company and appeal it! They will pay don't worry, they MUST, you make em girl!

You know what I still sleep on a queen, I love it and would not trade it ever... for a king or a california king even....didn't you hear queen beds are for queens....yeah babaaay...

hugs ooooo

At 6:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd get the king, but we're not cuddlers. When we go to bed to sleep, we are sleeping and there will be no interference. When H and I got married, we each arrived at our house with our own queen beds- which we were used to taking up ourselves. We tried to share a queen for 3 months and had to buy a king. And, don't think we haven't thought about buying another king and just pushing the two together. Wow. That'd be awesome.

At 9:26 AM, Blogger Heather said...

I HATE INSURANCE COMPANIES. Ok, I love them but I totally hate them. I really hate that IF is so expensive!

Glad you had a good lunch. It is nice to indulge sometimes.

At 5:34 PM, Blogger Mary Ellen and Steve said...

I am sorry about the bill for the IVF. You should definitely appeal it. I hope you are able to figure it out.

Glad that you had a good lunch.

At 6:40 AM, Blogger zhl said...

Love the Freudian slip. Hate that you got that bill in the mail. Sorry y'all are in a funk.

At 7:19 PM, Blogger Donna said...

The baby shower, the IVF bill, needing new stuff but not having the money to buy it, all very stressful. I cannot watch Dancing with the Stars because I know a little bit about dancing and what they do on that show doesn't qualify in my book. The fact that Jerry Springer didn't leave after the first 5 minutes proved that.

At 7:52 PM, Anonymous shazz said...

They will try and sqeeze money out of you anyway they can....as if they dont' get enough!! Appeal it we pay enough for IVF as it is.

At 2:36 AM, Blogger Lut C. said...

A King Size bed? Might as well get a divorce for all the distance it creates. I'm not a fan of the King-size bed.

The shower is tough, but I guess you might regret it if you didn't throw her one. Can you ask one of your friends to come and lend a hand? Someone to be the hostess for a few minutes if ever you need to regain your composure out of view?


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